How to Be a Better Person Day by Day
Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better.
Emile Coue
Being a better person is a process. No matter how good someone is, he can’t be perfect overnight. So the important thing is that you grow every day. Make growing a habit and you will see significant progress when you look back.
Here are several things you should do to be a better person day by day:
1. Take responsibility
Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.
Carol Burnett
Before anything else, you should realize that the one who is responsible for your life is you. Don’t blame other people or external condition for how you live your life. No matter how bad the situation might be, it’s you who decide how to respond to it. No matter what happens to you, it’s you who decide how it affects you.
2. Choose to grow
The strongest principle of growth lies in human choice.
George Eliot
After taking the responsibility for your life, the next thing you should do is deciding that you want to grow. Choose to grow rather than staying where you are. Choose to be a better person every day.
3. Make room for growth
If the shoe fits, you’re not allowing for growth.
Robert N. Coons
How can you grow if there is no room for it? What I mean is not physical room, of course. Instead, you should make room for growth in your mind. Believe in yourself that you can grow. Believe that you can make the changes you want. Don’t limit yourself and aim to be the best that you can be.
4. Don’t expect instant results
While you should make room for growth, you should also have realistic expectations. If you expect too much, you might get disappointed and discouraged. It takes time to grow so don’t lose heart if you still couldn’t become the person you want to be. Remember what Moliere said:
The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit.
5. Extract lessons from your experiences
Extracting lessons from your experiences is essential for your personal growth. Those who do will outgrow those who don’t. So make every experience a learning opportunity. Open your eyes and grab every possible lesson.
6. Keep a journal
Whatever lesson you learn, write it down in a journal. Keeping a journal can save you a lot of time because you don’t have to repeat the same mistakes again and again.
7. Build positive habits
Doing small things consistently can make a big difference over time. Choose a simple activity that helps you grow and do it every day. For example, you may choose to read for half an hour every day. Or you may allocate time to pray or meditate every day. The important thing is that you do it consistently.
8. Face your fear
Your fear limits your growth. Because of that you need to identify, face, and conquer your fear. It’s not easy to do, but as Anais Nin said:
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.
9. Have quality input
Your input determines your output. That’s why you need to feed your mind with positive and uplifting thoughts every day. Listen to motivational audio and video programs. Read inspiring books. Read quotes by great people.
10. Be around positive people
The people around you have great influence on you. They can make or break your life. I’m lucky to have a lot of positive people around me that encourage me to grow. They act as a source of energy and inspiration for me.
11. Find role models
It’s much easier to achieve something if you have role models that become examples for you. Instead of having a lot of abstract ideas of what you want to be, you have concrete examples in front of you. So find people with positive traits you admire and let them inspire you.
12. Find mentors
Mentors are even more important than role models. You usually don’t have personal relationships with your role models, but you do have personal relationships with your mentors. A mentor is someone who can guide you through the walk of life. Mentors can help you grow much faster because you don’t need to repeat the mistakes they have made. No longer do you need to find the right path yourself. No longer do you need to find truth the hard way.
0 Get the Most Out of Your Holiday
10 Tips to Get the Most Out of Your Holiday
On the Easter weekend, I went out of town and spent several days at my parents’s home. There I enjoyed the holiday away from my normal routines. While usually I have a set of daily routines related to my work or personal growth, I decided not to follow them and spent my time to do different things instead.
That allowed me to get more from the holiday. Here are some benefits I got that I believe you will also get from a good (albeit short) holiday:
1. My mind was fresh
This is a significant benefit for me. The holiday decluttered my mind. It’s like having a new sheet of paper to write on.
2. I could see things from different perspective
Since I spent my time at different place doing different things, I could see things from a new perspective. Seeing things from a new perspective is important to keep our mind sharp. Think of your mind as a double-edged sword. Using one perspective is like using just one edge of the sword; over time it may become blunt.
3. I had time to think
When I’m too involved in an activity, it could be difficult to see whether or not it’s right. But when I’m away from it, it’s easier to see whether or not I’ve done the right things. I also have time to think about where to go next. No wonder Bill Gates has Think Week twice a year.
4. I had quality time with my loved ones
Busyness might make it difficult to have enough quality time with our loved ones. Holiday is a good opportunity to get it back.
(Donald Latumahina)
Looking back, there are several things I could do to get the most out of the holiday. I didn’t do all of them, but I wish I did.
Here are 10 tips to get the most out of your holiday:
1. Forget your routines
It should be the first thing you do if you want to have fresh mind and perspective. You should be away from your normal routines.
2. Minimize your Internet time
If you were like me, you spend hours on the Net everyday. Continuing the previous tip, minimizing (or even eliminating) Internet time is necessary if you want to be away from your normal routines.
3. Go out of town
While you can also enjoy holiday without going out of town, being at a new place can affect your mind significantly. It helps you see things differently.
4. Spend time with your loved ones
This is perhaps the most important tip in this list. Though we (me included) could sometimes forget it, relationships should be our top priority.
5. Read something different
I mostly read nonfiction, but in the holiday I read a novel (Dan Brown’s Deception Point, to be exact). It’s refreshing.
6. Go to nature
This may not always be possible (depending on where you go for holiday), but it’s perhaps the best place to go to refresh your mind. I’m lucky because just outside of the town, there is a mountain with fresh air and beautiful view.
7. Connect with old friends
If you happened to go to your home town for holiday (like I did), this is a good idea. There should be some old friends in your home town you haven’t met for long time.
8. Go to unusual places
Try to go to places you rarely (or never) go to. If they are not already your favorite, you can go to places like museum or national park.
9. Make it your “think week”
Granted, you may not have 7 days like Bill Gates for Think Week. But the time when you are away from your routines is the best time to think about how you do things. You can read more about it at Think Week: A Great Way to Get New Insights.
10. Make it your spiritual retreat
Holiday is also good time to fill your spiritual tank. Praying, meditating or reading spiritual texts may give you more when your mind is clear and there is no pressure from your normal routines.
On the Easter weekend, I went out of town and spent several days at my parents’s home. There I enjoyed the holiday away from my normal routines. While usually I have a set of daily routines related to my work or personal growth, I decided not to follow them and spent my time to do different things instead.
That allowed me to get more from the holiday. Here are some benefits I got that I believe you will also get from a good (albeit short) holiday:
1. My mind was fresh
This is a significant benefit for me. The holiday decluttered my mind. It’s like having a new sheet of paper to write on.
2. I could see things from different perspective
Since I spent my time at different place doing different things, I could see things from a new perspective. Seeing things from a new perspective is important to keep our mind sharp. Think of your mind as a double-edged sword. Using one perspective is like using just one edge of the sword; over time it may become blunt.
3. I had time to think
When I’m too involved in an activity, it could be difficult to see whether or not it’s right. But when I’m away from it, it’s easier to see whether or not I’ve done the right things. I also have time to think about where to go next. No wonder Bill Gates has Think Week twice a year.
4. I had quality time with my loved ones
Busyness might make it difficult to have enough quality time with our loved ones. Holiday is a good opportunity to get it back.
(Donald Latumahina)
Looking back, there are several things I could do to get the most out of the holiday. I didn’t do all of them, but I wish I did.
Here are 10 tips to get the most out of your holiday:
1. Forget your routines
It should be the first thing you do if you want to have fresh mind and perspective. You should be away from your normal routines.
2. Minimize your Internet time
If you were like me, you spend hours on the Net everyday. Continuing the previous tip, minimizing (or even eliminating) Internet time is necessary if you want to be away from your normal routines.
3. Go out of town
While you can also enjoy holiday without going out of town, being at a new place can affect your mind significantly. It helps you see things differently.
4. Spend time with your loved ones
This is perhaps the most important tip in this list. Though we (me included) could sometimes forget it, relationships should be our top priority.
5. Read something different
I mostly read nonfiction, but in the holiday I read a novel (Dan Brown’s Deception Point, to be exact). It’s refreshing.
6. Go to nature
This may not always be possible (depending on where you go for holiday), but it’s perhaps the best place to go to refresh your mind. I’m lucky because just outside of the town, there is a mountain with fresh air and beautiful view.
7. Connect with old friends
If you happened to go to your home town for holiday (like I did), this is a good idea. There should be some old friends in your home town you haven’t met for long time.
8. Go to unusual places
Try to go to places you rarely (or never) go to. If they are not already your favorite, you can go to places like museum or national park.
9. Make it your “think week”
Granted, you may not have 7 days like Bill Gates for Think Week. But the time when you are away from your routines is the best time to think about how you do things. You can read more about it at Think Week: A Great Way to Get New Insights.
10. Make it your spiritual retreat
Holiday is also good time to fill your spiritual tank. Praying, meditating or reading spiritual texts may give you more when your mind is clear and there is no pressure from your normal routines.
0 Reduce Stress and Improve the Quality of Your Life…Today!
10 Simple Ways to Reduce Stress and Improve the Quality of Your Life…Today!
Life can be a grind…. in fact, most of the time it is. In between working 40-50 hours a week, mowing the lawn, cooking dinner, cleaning the house, taking the kids to soccer games, well..… you get the idea. At the end of it all, we’re toast! The body reacts negatively to consistently high levels of stress and many times lead to things such as burn out, anger, depression, and even physical illness. The body wasn’t made to go “Indy 500” all day long.
Our bodies need to regenerate as well as our minds and spirit. Many people are drinking 3-5 cups of coffee a day just to get by. Our culture tends to treat the symptom and leaves the root of the problem alone. The result is never fixing the problem and in many cases, making it worse. Illness can generally be traced to one or more of three sources: environment, diet or genetics. Stress lowers the immune system, making you more susceptible to disease. Combining this with a poor diet and toxic environment could potentially create a disaster!
Improving the quality of your life increases your return from it. It also has a direct impact on our relationships, how we perform at work and our health and well being. I challenge you to inventory the different aspects of your life in order to determine its quality. Here are 10 Simple Ways to Reduce Stress and Improve the Quality of Your Life…..Today!
1. Evaluate: your current situation. Most situations that we perceive as stressful really aren’t a serious threat; if we reassess our situation we can reduce our stress significantly.
2. Breath: When our bodies become tense, we temporarily stop breathing. Our bodies naturally regulate the amount of oxygen and carbon dioxide it needs by breathing naturally. Become conscious of this and take longer rhythmic breaths; this will both calm your body and help to focus your mind. Take 15 minutes each day to close your eyes and clear your mind.
3. Expenses: Lower them and consider working one less day per week. Imagine that! :)
4. Exercise: Do at least one if not two cardiovascular workouts per week. I like to swim and bike, because I’m fairly sure my running days are over.
5. Debt: Think of debt as in-laws that’ve been at your house for a month; it’s something you should consider getting rid of. If you don’t have the money, don’t spend it. This is the simplest way to stay out of financial trouble. Learn to use cash and keep a credit card for emergencies only. Build an emergency savings account if you don’t have one already.
6. Diet: Consider it and choose a healthier one. A trick that I use is to plan my meals in advance; this way I have a plan and it’s easier to stick to it. I also eat raw foods for one meal every day. For example: at least one meal every day consists of raw vegetables, fruit, or nuts. Your body’s getting more nutrition and it’s easier for your digestive system to break down, giving you more energy.
7. Relationships: Like your bones, you want em’ strong and healthy! We were built for relationships. A void is created when we aren’t investing in healthy relationships. Key word being healthy. As a result we fill that void with things like work, sports, pornography.…you can fill in the blank.
8. Passion: If what you’re doing every day from 9-5 isn’t your passion, consider making a change. If you’re not sure what it is you’re passionate about, create a little time and figure it out.
9. Love: Probably my favorite one. Give and receive love, know and be known, real, true, unconditional love; it’s the Greatest Power on Earth.
10. Spiritual Life: Cultivate one and learn to connect to the source of life, something greater than yourself.
Life can be a grind…. in fact, most of the time it is. In between working 40-50 hours a week, mowing the lawn, cooking dinner, cleaning the house, taking the kids to soccer games, well..… you get the idea. At the end of it all, we’re toast! The body reacts negatively to consistently high levels of stress and many times lead to things such as burn out, anger, depression, and even physical illness. The body wasn’t made to go “Indy 500” all day long.
Our bodies need to regenerate as well as our minds and spirit. Many people are drinking 3-5 cups of coffee a day just to get by. Our culture tends to treat the symptom and leaves the root of the problem alone. The result is never fixing the problem and in many cases, making it worse. Illness can generally be traced to one or more of three sources: environment, diet or genetics. Stress lowers the immune system, making you more susceptible to disease. Combining this with a poor diet and toxic environment could potentially create a disaster!
Improving the quality of your life increases your return from it. It also has a direct impact on our relationships, how we perform at work and our health and well being. I challenge you to inventory the different aspects of your life in order to determine its quality. Here are 10 Simple Ways to Reduce Stress and Improve the Quality of Your Life…..Today!
1. Evaluate: your current situation. Most situations that we perceive as stressful really aren’t a serious threat; if we reassess our situation we can reduce our stress significantly.
2. Breath: When our bodies become tense, we temporarily stop breathing. Our bodies naturally regulate the amount of oxygen and carbon dioxide it needs by breathing naturally. Become conscious of this and take longer rhythmic breaths; this will both calm your body and help to focus your mind. Take 15 minutes each day to close your eyes and clear your mind.
3. Expenses: Lower them and consider working one less day per week. Imagine that! :)
4. Exercise: Do at least one if not two cardiovascular workouts per week. I like to swim and bike, because I’m fairly sure my running days are over.
5. Debt: Think of debt as in-laws that’ve been at your house for a month; it’s something you should consider getting rid of. If you don’t have the money, don’t spend it. This is the simplest way to stay out of financial trouble. Learn to use cash and keep a credit card for emergencies only. Build an emergency savings account if you don’t have one already.
6. Diet: Consider it and choose a healthier one. A trick that I use is to plan my meals in advance; this way I have a plan and it’s easier to stick to it. I also eat raw foods for one meal every day. For example: at least one meal every day consists of raw vegetables, fruit, or nuts. Your body’s getting more nutrition and it’s easier for your digestive system to break down, giving you more energy.
7. Relationships: Like your bones, you want em’ strong and healthy! We were built for relationships. A void is created when we aren’t investing in healthy relationships. Key word being healthy. As a result we fill that void with things like work, sports, pornography.…you can fill in the blank.
8. Passion: If what you’re doing every day from 9-5 isn’t your passion, consider making a change. If you’re not sure what it is you’re passionate about, create a little time and figure it out.
9. Love: Probably my favorite one. Give and receive love, know and be known, real, true, unconditional love; it’s the Greatest Power on Earth.
10. Spiritual Life: Cultivate one and learn to connect to the source of life, something greater than yourself.
0 Today is a Gift: 10 Reasons to Love Your Life Today
Today is a Gift: 10 Reasons to Love Your Life Today
Today is a gift. We have all the reasons to be excited about today, but too often we forget about it. We may end up complaining and feel bad about today. Don’t let it happen. Let’s count your blessings and see why you should love your life today:
1. Today you are healthy
We are so used to being healthy that we forget how good being healthy is. Sometimes we need to be sick to appreciate the blessing of being healthy.
2. Today you have someone who loves you
Being lonely is terrible. Today, if you have someone who loves you, you have something more valuable than wealth.
3. Today you have opportunity to love
Not only do you have someone who loves you, today you also have the opportunity to love them – and other people – back.
4. Today you have good meals to eat
If you can eat a good meal today, just remember that many people can’t. Many people struggle to eat even once a day.
5. Today you have a job
Many people are jobless. If you aren’t, you have a reason to be excited about your work.
6. Today you live in peace
I just can’t imagine living in the midst of war. Fear and terror will always haunt me. I could lose the people I love anytime. I could even lose my life.
7. Today you have clean air to breathe
You don’t have to wear a mask, do you? Many people in the world must. In some parts of the world the air quality is so bad people can no longer breathe freely.
8. Today you are safe
You can go to the places you want without worrying that something bad will happen to you. That’s something to be grateful for.
9. Today you have opportunity to give
Giving is among the best ways to increase your happiness and today you have the opportunity to give.
10. Today is a new day
Forget the past. Forget yesterday. Today you have the opportunity to begin a new.
Today is a gift. We have all the reasons to be excited about today, but too often we forget about it. We may end up complaining and feel bad about today. Don’t let it happen. Let’s count your blessings and see why you should love your life today:
1. Today you are healthy
We are so used to being healthy that we forget how good being healthy is. Sometimes we need to be sick to appreciate the blessing of being healthy.
2. Today you have someone who loves you
Being lonely is terrible. Today, if you have someone who loves you, you have something more valuable than wealth.
3. Today you have opportunity to love
Not only do you have someone who loves you, today you also have the opportunity to love them – and other people – back.
4. Today you have good meals to eat
If you can eat a good meal today, just remember that many people can’t. Many people struggle to eat even once a day.
5. Today you have a job
Many people are jobless. If you aren’t, you have a reason to be excited about your work.
6. Today you live in peace
I just can’t imagine living in the midst of war. Fear and terror will always haunt me. I could lose the people I love anytime. I could even lose my life.
7. Today you have clean air to breathe
You don’t have to wear a mask, do you? Many people in the world must. In some parts of the world the air quality is so bad people can no longer breathe freely.
8. Today you are safe
You can go to the places you want without worrying that something bad will happen to you. That’s something to be grateful for.
9. Today you have opportunity to give
Giving is among the best ways to increase your happiness and today you have the opportunity to give.
10. Today is a new day
Forget the past. Forget yesterday. Today you have the opportunity to begin a new.
0 10 Steps To Achieve Excellence in Anything
10 Steps To Achieve Excellence in Anything
When I was a kid, people would constantly speak in admiration of those who were excellent in whatever they were doing. These could be students who achieved academic excellence, successful business people, top athletes, celebrities, and so on. Envy aside, no one ever spent any time to think about why or how they were excellent. It was seemingly natural for most to just accept that certain people were meant for excellence while others weren’t.
As I grew up, I started to form personal goals which I pursued fervently. I would set different goals, generally anchored on academia and performance-related goals, since the country I lived in (Singapore) was a meritocratic society. In the process of my goal pursuit, I would experience the natural process of success and setbacks.
As I gained more experience and observed people who achieved excellence, I started to identify a certain pattern that linked up successes – a pattern of certain principles and beliefs. And when I acted in accordance to these, I would experience excellence in whatever I did – whether it was being on the dean’s list, graduating as the top marketing student in my Business School, nabbing a job offer in a Fortune 100 company against hundreds of applicants, delivering historical record-breaking results when I was working there, creating my personal excellence blog which has tens of thousands of readers after a short-span of months, getting overwhelming demand for my coaching services (which currently has a waiting list of 3 months), and so on. As long as I keep focusing on these key principles, results would be eminent.
If you have ever looked at the achievements of others and thought “Wow, if only I can do that!”, or if you have ever wished that you can perform better, earn more money, make more friends, have better health, achieve higher level of success, and so on, here’s the holler-out to you: You are capable of all of that. Everyone has all the potential in the world to do whatever it is they dream of or want. Following these key principles of personal excellence will go a long way in bringing you to excellence:
1. Have the hunger for excellence
You need to want to achieve excellence. The emphasis here is on what ‘you’ want, not what others want. Make sure the goal is something you set for yourself, because unless it is, chances are you don’t really want it. And if you don’t want the goal badly enough, it doesn’t matter what you try to do since the drive will not be there to keep you moving forward. It’s pointless to sign yourself up for something and put in a half-baked effort, because a) it’s not being true to yourself b) it’s just wasting your time at the end.This is why I always make sure I aim for the best in whatever I set myself to do.
2. Benchmark against the best
What is it you are working on? Who are the people who are the best in this area? What are the results they have achieved? Set your targets to the same level as their best results, or even higher if you are feeling up to it.
At the moment, I’m setting up my school of personal excellence for anyone who has a passion for personal excellence. My long-term vision for this school is to be as big as the Xavier’s School in X-Men. ;) (In fact, I have the picture of Xavier’s School up on my vision board since last year!) While this vision may seem far-fetched to many, it’s a vision which I’m working towards and one which I have absolutely no doubt will come to life given time and effort.
3. Believe that you can do it
Self-belief is paramount to every success. You need to first believe in yourself to get somewhere. If you don’t have self-confidence, who is going to believe in you? If you have often experience low self-belief, look back at the times when you achieved something, regardless of how big or small it was. From there, build up your confidence and leverage it as you pursue your goals. As you begin to see results, your confidence will increase over time, which will create an upward spiraling effect.
4. Build concrete strategy & plans
Every goal needs a proper strategy and plan for it to come to life. Setting a goal and not following through with proper planning is like getting into your car to drive to your destination without knowing how to get there or even having a driving license. Many people fail in their goals because they fail to follow-through with planning. The bigger your goals, the more important that you invest proper time in building your plan. I have written a 7-part Goal Achievement series on what it takes to successfully achieve goals, which includes how to devise your winning strategy, create a robust plan, execute it and review.
5. Learn from the best
Hook up with people who are the best in the field and learn from them. They have the best practices, insights and tips which will be extremely valuable in your pursuit of excellence. Rather than trying to learn everything from scratch, it’s easier to leverage on the learnings from others and build on from there. This will jumpstart your learning curve by a huge degree.
6. Do not limit yourself
Don’t be afraid to try every single thing that might take you to your goal. In fact, be more concerned about the potential opportunities you might be missing out on when you don’t try something. Opening yourself up to possibilities will enable you to pick up on things which might be fundamental to your success.
7. Go all out; Work really hard
With every success, comes hard work. Without hard work, you cannot achieve results. People who try to find the easy way out are kidding themselves if they think they can achieve excellence without putting in hard work. If you observe around you, the people who seek out ‘get-rich-quick’ methods are also the very people who don’t achieve much in their lives. Hard work is the universal quality that will pay off in the long-term. Once you invest the due time and effort, the results will start coming in.
8. Focus your efforts
Once you have finished trying out every single thing that you can see, now focus your efforts in the areas which bring you the most results. I subscribe to the 80-20 principle, where 20% of causes lead to 80% of effects you see in a situation. Focus your energy in the few key drivers of success which will lead you to the results you want. This way, you will utilize your efforts more effectively, which can be subsequently channeled into more value-added activities.
9. Be adaptable.
Adaptability is one of the essential pillars of excellence. As you may already know, change is inevitable – You can either cower in the face of change, learn to deal with it or even turn it into your favor. Be ready for change at all times and develop a friendly relationship with change.
This also applies to changing your plans. Don’t be overly attached to your plans and be prepared to alter them where needed. If there are certain things you are doing which are not very effective, be prepared to improvise them or drop them totally.
10. Never give up.
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
Elbert Hubbard
Don’t ever give up. Remember that defeat never occurs unless you accept it as defeat. If a certain problem is too big for you to handle, break it down into smaller pieces so it’s easier for you to tackle them. As long as you keep trying, you will eventually achieve your goal.
A favorite story of mine is Sylvester Stallone’s rags-to-riches story of how he overcame overwhelming odds in his life to be the international movie star we know him to be today. When he was a baby, he was born with a half-paralyzed face due to birth complications, which led to a slurred speech. This was the key reason why he was rejected thousands of times by casting agents. Because he never gave up, he finally got his big break as the star of Rocky one day – and this only came after years and years of relentlessly trying.
Work on embodying these 10 excellence principles in you and start seeing yourself soar to excellence. I’d love to hear from you personally on how they work out for you :)
When I was a kid, people would constantly speak in admiration of those who were excellent in whatever they were doing. These could be students who achieved academic excellence, successful business people, top athletes, celebrities, and so on. Envy aside, no one ever spent any time to think about why or how they were excellent. It was seemingly natural for most to just accept that certain people were meant for excellence while others weren’t.
As I grew up, I started to form personal goals which I pursued fervently. I would set different goals, generally anchored on academia and performance-related goals, since the country I lived in (Singapore) was a meritocratic society. In the process of my goal pursuit, I would experience the natural process of success and setbacks.
As I gained more experience and observed people who achieved excellence, I started to identify a certain pattern that linked up successes – a pattern of certain principles and beliefs. And when I acted in accordance to these, I would experience excellence in whatever I did – whether it was being on the dean’s list, graduating as the top marketing student in my Business School, nabbing a job offer in a Fortune 100 company against hundreds of applicants, delivering historical record-breaking results when I was working there, creating my personal excellence blog which has tens of thousands of readers after a short-span of months, getting overwhelming demand for my coaching services (which currently has a waiting list of 3 months), and so on. As long as I keep focusing on these key principles, results would be eminent.
If you have ever looked at the achievements of others and thought “Wow, if only I can do that!”, or if you have ever wished that you can perform better, earn more money, make more friends, have better health, achieve higher level of success, and so on, here’s the holler-out to you: You are capable of all of that. Everyone has all the potential in the world to do whatever it is they dream of or want. Following these key principles of personal excellence will go a long way in bringing you to excellence:
1. Have the hunger for excellence
You need to want to achieve excellence. The emphasis here is on what ‘you’ want, not what others want. Make sure the goal is something you set for yourself, because unless it is, chances are you don’t really want it. And if you don’t want the goal badly enough, it doesn’t matter what you try to do since the drive will not be there to keep you moving forward. It’s pointless to sign yourself up for something and put in a half-baked effort, because a) it’s not being true to yourself b) it’s just wasting your time at the end.This is why I always make sure I aim for the best in whatever I set myself to do.
2. Benchmark against the best
What is it you are working on? Who are the people who are the best in this area? What are the results they have achieved? Set your targets to the same level as their best results, or even higher if you are feeling up to it.
At the moment, I’m setting up my school of personal excellence for anyone who has a passion for personal excellence. My long-term vision for this school is to be as big as the Xavier’s School in X-Men. ;) (In fact, I have the picture of Xavier’s School up on my vision board since last year!) While this vision may seem far-fetched to many, it’s a vision which I’m working towards and one which I have absolutely no doubt will come to life given time and effort.
3. Believe that you can do it
Self-belief is paramount to every success. You need to first believe in yourself to get somewhere. If you don’t have self-confidence, who is going to believe in you? If you have often experience low self-belief, look back at the times when you achieved something, regardless of how big or small it was. From there, build up your confidence and leverage it as you pursue your goals. As you begin to see results, your confidence will increase over time, which will create an upward spiraling effect.
4. Build concrete strategy & plans
Every goal needs a proper strategy and plan for it to come to life. Setting a goal and not following through with proper planning is like getting into your car to drive to your destination without knowing how to get there or even having a driving license. Many people fail in their goals because they fail to follow-through with planning. The bigger your goals, the more important that you invest proper time in building your plan. I have written a 7-part Goal Achievement series on what it takes to successfully achieve goals, which includes how to devise your winning strategy, create a robust plan, execute it and review.
5. Learn from the best
Hook up with people who are the best in the field and learn from them. They have the best practices, insights and tips which will be extremely valuable in your pursuit of excellence. Rather than trying to learn everything from scratch, it’s easier to leverage on the learnings from others and build on from there. This will jumpstart your learning curve by a huge degree.
6. Do not limit yourself
Don’t be afraid to try every single thing that might take you to your goal. In fact, be more concerned about the potential opportunities you might be missing out on when you don’t try something. Opening yourself up to possibilities will enable you to pick up on things which might be fundamental to your success.
7. Go all out; Work really hard
With every success, comes hard work. Without hard work, you cannot achieve results. People who try to find the easy way out are kidding themselves if they think they can achieve excellence without putting in hard work. If you observe around you, the people who seek out ‘get-rich-quick’ methods are also the very people who don’t achieve much in their lives. Hard work is the universal quality that will pay off in the long-term. Once you invest the due time and effort, the results will start coming in.
8. Focus your efforts
Once you have finished trying out every single thing that you can see, now focus your efforts in the areas which bring you the most results. I subscribe to the 80-20 principle, where 20% of causes lead to 80% of effects you see in a situation. Focus your energy in the few key drivers of success which will lead you to the results you want. This way, you will utilize your efforts more effectively, which can be subsequently channeled into more value-added activities.
9. Be adaptable.
Adaptability is one of the essential pillars of excellence. As you may already know, change is inevitable – You can either cower in the face of change, learn to deal with it or even turn it into your favor. Be ready for change at all times and develop a friendly relationship with change.
This also applies to changing your plans. Don’t be overly attached to your plans and be prepared to alter them where needed. If there are certain things you are doing which are not very effective, be prepared to improvise them or drop them totally.
10. Never give up.
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
Elbert Hubbard
Don’t ever give up. Remember that defeat never occurs unless you accept it as defeat. If a certain problem is too big for you to handle, break it down into smaller pieces so it’s easier for you to tackle them. As long as you keep trying, you will eventually achieve your goal.
A favorite story of mine is Sylvester Stallone’s rags-to-riches story of how he overcame overwhelming odds in his life to be the international movie star we know him to be today. When he was a baby, he was born with a half-paralyzed face due to birth complications, which led to a slurred speech. This was the key reason why he was rejected thousands of times by casting agents. Because he never gave up, he finally got his big break as the star of Rocky one day – and this only came after years and years of relentlessly trying.
Work on embodying these 10 excellence principles in you and start seeing yourself soar to excellence. I’d love to hear from you personally on how they work out for you :)
0 Personal Analytics
Personal Analytics: The Next Big Thing in Self Improvement?
Recently the idea of personal analytics hits me more and more. What is personal analytics? It’s a way of making decisions in someone’s life based on numbers. You measure certain aspects of your life, analyze the results, and make decisions based on them.
Over time I find more things pointing to this direction. All these make me wonder: is personal analytics the next big thing in self improvement?
It started about two years ago when I read an excerpt of the book Super Crunchers. The book talks about how smart companies “act by numbers.” Instead of making decisions based on intuition, they make decisions based on what they measure and calculate. For instance, they use mathematical models to accurately predict how the customers will behave in certain situations and adjust their operations accordingly. This way the companies can directly make the right decisions without wasting their resources. The book even says that those companies know about your preferences better than you.
Reading that made me think: is it possible to apply that at individual level? Can individuals live by numbers? Can someone make decisions for his life not based on intuition but based on facts? If we can apply that, that will be a great leap forward. Just like the companies, you will be able to optimize your life to get the most out of it.
As it turns out, some people already do that. They already live by numbers to optimize their lives. My favorite example is Jim Collins, the author of Built to Last and Good to Great. Here is what The New York Times wrote about him:
And in a corner of the white board at the end of his long conference room, Mr. Collins keeps this short list:
Creative 53%
Teaching 28%
Other 19%
That, he explains, is a running tally of how he’s spending his time, and whether he’s sticking to a big goal he set for himself years ago: to spend 50 percent of his workdays on creative pursuits like research and writing books, 30 percent on teaching-related activities, and 20 percent on all the other things he has to do.
These aren’t ballpark guesstimates. Mr. Collins, who is 51, keeps a stopwatch with three separate timers in his pocket at all times, stopping and starting them as he switches activities. Then he regularly logs the times into a spreadsheet.
That’s not all. From the same article:
Oh, he sleeps with vigor, too. He figures that he needs to get 70 to 75 hours of sleep every 10 days, and once went to a sleep lab to learn more about his own patterns. Now – surprise, surprise – he logs his time spent on a pillow, naps included, and monitors a rolling average.
“If I start falling below that,” he says, pointing to the short list on his whiteboard, “I can still teach and do ‘other,’ but I can’t create.”
Isn’t that amazing? He carefully measures certain parts of his life in order to improve them. He makes his decisions not based on memory or intuition but based on numbers. Jim Collins is the best example I’ve found so far of someone who is living by numbers.
But will personal analytics be a common phenomenon?
Well, there is one difficulty here: the data-gathering process. A company has a lot of resources to measure almost anything in its operation. It can set up a separate division to do just that. But an individual has limited resources. You have only yourself to do everything. I’m sure many people won’t be patient and diligent enough for that. Even those who do must be careful not to spend too many resources on it at the expense of the real, productive work. Because of these difficulties, only a few people like Jim Collins apply personal analytics effectively.
Fortunately, it may change in the future. There are new products coming out that make it easy for you to gather data. One good example is the Nike+ system:
Veronica Noone attached a small sensor to her running shoes and headed out the door. She pressed start on her iPod and began keeping track of every step she took. It wasn’t a long run – just 1.67 miles in 18 minutes and 36 seconds, but it was the start of something very big for her.
Since that day, she’s run 95 more times, logging 283.8 miles in about 48 hours on the road. She’s burned 28,672 calories. And her weight, which topped 225 pounds when she was pregnant, has settled in at about 145.
Noone knows all of that thanks to the sensor system, called Nike+. After each run, she can sync her iPod to the Nike+ Web site and get a visual representation of the workout – a single green line. Its length shows how far she’s gone, and the peaks and valleys reflect her speed.
Products like Nike+ make data gathering effortless. We can expect more and more products like that emerge in the future. When that happens, you can easily measure many aspects of your life and use them to optimize your life.
Recently the idea of personal analytics hits me more and more. What is personal analytics? It’s a way of making decisions in someone’s life based on numbers. You measure certain aspects of your life, analyze the results, and make decisions based on them.
Over time I find more things pointing to this direction. All these make me wonder: is personal analytics the next big thing in self improvement?
It started about two years ago when I read an excerpt of the book Super Crunchers. The book talks about how smart companies “act by numbers.” Instead of making decisions based on intuition, they make decisions based on what they measure and calculate. For instance, they use mathematical models to accurately predict how the customers will behave in certain situations and adjust their operations accordingly. This way the companies can directly make the right decisions without wasting their resources. The book even says that those companies know about your preferences better than you.
Reading that made me think: is it possible to apply that at individual level? Can individuals live by numbers? Can someone make decisions for his life not based on intuition but based on facts? If we can apply that, that will be a great leap forward. Just like the companies, you will be able to optimize your life to get the most out of it.
As it turns out, some people already do that. They already live by numbers to optimize their lives. My favorite example is Jim Collins, the author of Built to Last and Good to Great. Here is what The New York Times wrote about him:
And in a corner of the white board at the end of his long conference room, Mr. Collins keeps this short list:
Creative 53%
Teaching 28%
Other 19%
That, he explains, is a running tally of how he’s spending his time, and whether he’s sticking to a big goal he set for himself years ago: to spend 50 percent of his workdays on creative pursuits like research and writing books, 30 percent on teaching-related activities, and 20 percent on all the other things he has to do.
These aren’t ballpark guesstimates. Mr. Collins, who is 51, keeps a stopwatch with three separate timers in his pocket at all times, stopping and starting them as he switches activities. Then he regularly logs the times into a spreadsheet.
That’s not all. From the same article:
Oh, he sleeps with vigor, too. He figures that he needs to get 70 to 75 hours of sleep every 10 days, and once went to a sleep lab to learn more about his own patterns. Now – surprise, surprise – he logs his time spent on a pillow, naps included, and monitors a rolling average.
“If I start falling below that,” he says, pointing to the short list on his whiteboard, “I can still teach and do ‘other,’ but I can’t create.”
Isn’t that amazing? He carefully measures certain parts of his life in order to improve them. He makes his decisions not based on memory or intuition but based on numbers. Jim Collins is the best example I’ve found so far of someone who is living by numbers.
But will personal analytics be a common phenomenon?
Well, there is one difficulty here: the data-gathering process. A company has a lot of resources to measure almost anything in its operation. It can set up a separate division to do just that. But an individual has limited resources. You have only yourself to do everything. I’m sure many people won’t be patient and diligent enough for that. Even those who do must be careful not to spend too many resources on it at the expense of the real, productive work. Because of these difficulties, only a few people like Jim Collins apply personal analytics effectively.
Fortunately, it may change in the future. There are new products coming out that make it easy for you to gather data. One good example is the Nike+ system:
Veronica Noone attached a small sensor to her running shoes and headed out the door. She pressed start on her iPod and began keeping track of every step she took. It wasn’t a long run – just 1.67 miles in 18 minutes and 36 seconds, but it was the start of something very big for her.
Since that day, she’s run 95 more times, logging 283.8 miles in about 48 hours on the road. She’s burned 28,672 calories. And her weight, which topped 225 pounds when she was pregnant, has settled in at about 145.
Noone knows all of that thanks to the sensor system, called Nike+. After each run, she can sync her iPod to the Nike+ Web site and get a visual representation of the workout – a single green line. Its length shows how far she’s gone, and the peaks and valleys reflect her speed.
Products like Nike+ make data gathering effortless. We can expect more and more products like that emerge in the future. When that happens, you can easily measure many aspects of your life and use them to optimize your life.
0 8 Tips to Help You Study Better and More Effectively
8 Tips to Help You Study Better and More Effectively
While you might already be ahead of the game if you are studying at all, you might as well make the most of the time you spend preparing for class and ensure that all those hours you put into reviewing notes and reading chapters actually pay off. Here are some tips that can help you learn to study better and get more out of what you’re studying so you can spend less time pouring over books and more time enjoying life at school.
1. Find some peace and quiet. Studies have shown that just 20 minutes of highly focused, quiet time can help you learn and remember more than hours of working with distractions and while multi-tasking. So, to get the most out of your study time retreat to a place where you won’t be bothered by loud music or talking and can just focus in on your work.
2. Get organized. If your papers and materials are all over, you’ll spend just as much time looking for what you need as actually reading through and absorbing material which doesn’t make for a very productive use of your time. Keep one notebook just for notes for a class and ensure that all your papers are in a place you can actually locate them. It might take more planning up front but it will pay off in the long run.
3. Take breaks. Studying intensely can really take a toll on your brain and eventually make it hard for you to think clearly at all. That isn’t much of a help when you’re trying to understand difficult concepts or learn new things. Take short breaks during your study time so you can rest your eyes and mind and come back refreshed and ready to learn.
4. Have a schedule. The problem with the way that many students study is that they wait until the last minute and begin cramming the day before a big test. This really isn’t the most effective way to learn or remember new information. While it might not be fun, spending time in the weeks leading up to a test reviewing the material will be much more beneficial and might actually help you remember the material after the test as well.
5. Consider the subject. Each subject has a particular way in which it will be easiest to learn and remember. Subjects that require memorization may be more easy to learn with flashcards and timelines while subjects like math that require problem solving might be better served with doing the practice problems in your book. Spend some time figuring out just how you learn each subject best and then use that knowledge to maximize what you get out of your study sessions.
6. Study more frequently. It isn’t the duration of your study sessions that really makes a difference, it’s the frequency. You’ll learn a lot more through repetition, so break up your study time into shorter sessions every day rather than trying to cram it all in at the last minute.
7. Write it down. For most people, writing things down helps big time when it comes time to recall things on a test or even just during study time. Take notes in class and use methods that require you to do something to actively participate in learning the material– not just reading it over and over.
8. Be realistic. You’re not going to be able to memorize an entire month’s worth of material in only one night of intense studying. You likely won’t remember a good chunk of it. Be realistic in how you break up your study sessions and tackle only the amount of material that you’ll actually be able to benefit from studying– not the whole book at once.
While you might already be ahead of the game if you are studying at all, you might as well make the most of the time you spend preparing for class and ensure that all those hours you put into reviewing notes and reading chapters actually pay off. Here are some tips that can help you learn to study better and get more out of what you’re studying so you can spend less time pouring over books and more time enjoying life at school.
1. Find some peace and quiet. Studies have shown that just 20 minutes of highly focused, quiet time can help you learn and remember more than hours of working with distractions and while multi-tasking. So, to get the most out of your study time retreat to a place where you won’t be bothered by loud music or talking and can just focus in on your work.
2. Get organized. If your papers and materials are all over, you’ll spend just as much time looking for what you need as actually reading through and absorbing material which doesn’t make for a very productive use of your time. Keep one notebook just for notes for a class and ensure that all your papers are in a place you can actually locate them. It might take more planning up front but it will pay off in the long run.
3. Take breaks. Studying intensely can really take a toll on your brain and eventually make it hard for you to think clearly at all. That isn’t much of a help when you’re trying to understand difficult concepts or learn new things. Take short breaks during your study time so you can rest your eyes and mind and come back refreshed and ready to learn.
4. Have a schedule. The problem with the way that many students study is that they wait until the last minute and begin cramming the day before a big test. This really isn’t the most effective way to learn or remember new information. While it might not be fun, spending time in the weeks leading up to a test reviewing the material will be much more beneficial and might actually help you remember the material after the test as well.
5. Consider the subject. Each subject has a particular way in which it will be easiest to learn and remember. Subjects that require memorization may be more easy to learn with flashcards and timelines while subjects like math that require problem solving might be better served with doing the practice problems in your book. Spend some time figuring out just how you learn each subject best and then use that knowledge to maximize what you get out of your study sessions.
6. Study more frequently. It isn’t the duration of your study sessions that really makes a difference, it’s the frequency. You’ll learn a lot more through repetition, so break up your study time into shorter sessions every day rather than trying to cram it all in at the last minute.
7. Write it down. For most people, writing things down helps big time when it comes time to recall things on a test or even just during study time. Take notes in class and use methods that require you to do something to actively participate in learning the material– not just reading it over and over.
8. Be realistic. You’re not going to be able to memorize an entire month’s worth of material in only one night of intense studying. You likely won’t remember a good chunk of it. Be realistic in how you break up your study sessions and tackle only the amount of material that you’ll actually be able to benefit from studying– not the whole book at once.
0 How to Stop Worrying
How to Stop Worrying
Worry does not empty tomorrow of sorrow – it empties today of strength.
Corrie ten Boom
You need to know how to stop worrying if you want to live life to the fullest. Why? Because worry doesn’t do you any good. It won’t help you live a better life. It won’t make you feel better and more energized. Instead, it will make you less happy and less productive.
But how can we do that? How can we stop worrying? Here are eight ways:
1. Focus on what you can control
Thinking about things you can’t control puts unnecessary burden on your mind. For example, why should you worry about how bad the economy is? There’s nothing you can do about it unless you are a key person in the government. No matter how much you think about it, nothing will change. So instead of worrying about it, focus on things you can control like building your network and increasing your value. Don’t worry about things you can’t do anything about.
2. Use your imagination positively
Worry is a misuse of imagination.
Dan Zadra
Your imagination is a double-edged sword. You can use it to dream big dreams and keep your motivation high, but you can also use it to discourage yourself. People often worry about something because they fill their imagination with all the bad things that might happen. The reality is often not that bad, but it looks worse and worse because they give it too much attention.
3. Expect good things to happen
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.
Benjamin Franklin
Not only should you use your imagination positively, but also you should expect good things to happen in your life. Instead of expecting something to fail, expect it to succeed. Instead of expecting people not to like you, expect them to like you. You should be realistic, of course, but always expect to be a winner in life.
4. Accept responsibility
You might make mistakes in the past and worry about the consequences. In this case, the solution is to accept responsibility. Don’t let your worry drag you down. Accept the responsibility and move on. You still have a lot of great things waiting for you.
5. Be grateful
It’s easy to focus on the few things that could go wrong that we forget about the many things that already go right. That’s why having an attitude of gratitude is important. It keeps your perspective in balance. It makes you realize that for one thing that goes wrong there are many more things that go right. Just start with these simple things to be grateful for.
6. Run your own race
Stop comparing yourself with other people. Comparing yourself with others will only drain your mental energy. You have your own race to run. Instead of comparing yourself with others, focus on being the best that you can be.
7. Simplify your life
The simpler your life is, the fewer things you could worry about. So instead of doing a lot of things, focus on the few things that are most fulfilling and give you the most return for your time and effort. Find your life purpose and use the 80/20 rule to choose the few important activities to focus on.
8. Have faith
You should focus on things you can control. But what about things you can’t control? What can we do to eliminate any worry about them? The answer here is faith. You need to believe that everything will go well no matter how bad it might seem. You need to believe that everything will come out better in the end. Having faith eliminates a lot of worries in your life. It gives you peace of mind.
Worry does not empty tomorrow of sorrow – it empties today of strength.
Corrie ten Boom
You need to know how to stop worrying if you want to live life to the fullest. Why? Because worry doesn’t do you any good. It won’t help you live a better life. It won’t make you feel better and more energized. Instead, it will make you less happy and less productive.
But how can we do that? How can we stop worrying? Here are eight ways:
1. Focus on what you can control
Thinking about things you can’t control puts unnecessary burden on your mind. For example, why should you worry about how bad the economy is? There’s nothing you can do about it unless you are a key person in the government. No matter how much you think about it, nothing will change. So instead of worrying about it, focus on things you can control like building your network and increasing your value. Don’t worry about things you can’t do anything about.
2. Use your imagination positively
Worry is a misuse of imagination.
Dan Zadra
Your imagination is a double-edged sword. You can use it to dream big dreams and keep your motivation high, but you can also use it to discourage yourself. People often worry about something because they fill their imagination with all the bad things that might happen. The reality is often not that bad, but it looks worse and worse because they give it too much attention.
3. Expect good things to happen
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.
Benjamin Franklin
Not only should you use your imagination positively, but also you should expect good things to happen in your life. Instead of expecting something to fail, expect it to succeed. Instead of expecting people not to like you, expect them to like you. You should be realistic, of course, but always expect to be a winner in life.
4. Accept responsibility
You might make mistakes in the past and worry about the consequences. In this case, the solution is to accept responsibility. Don’t let your worry drag you down. Accept the responsibility and move on. You still have a lot of great things waiting for you.
5. Be grateful
It’s easy to focus on the few things that could go wrong that we forget about the many things that already go right. That’s why having an attitude of gratitude is important. It keeps your perspective in balance. It makes you realize that for one thing that goes wrong there are many more things that go right. Just start with these simple things to be grateful for.
6. Run your own race
Stop comparing yourself with other people. Comparing yourself with others will only drain your mental energy. You have your own race to run. Instead of comparing yourself with others, focus on being the best that you can be.
7. Simplify your life
The simpler your life is, the fewer things you could worry about. So instead of doing a lot of things, focus on the few things that are most fulfilling and give you the most return for your time and effort. Find your life purpose and use the 80/20 rule to choose the few important activities to focus on.
8. Have faith
You should focus on things you can control. But what about things you can’t control? What can we do to eliminate any worry about them? The answer here is faith. You need to believe that everything will go well no matter how bad it might seem. You need to believe that everything will come out better in the end. Having faith eliminates a lot of worries in your life. It gives you peace of mind.
